What does being content mean? Too often I think “when I get to this certain place, I will be content.” That’s wrong for two reasons. First, it completely negates the present time, and second, it doesn’t turn out to be true. Any time I’ve gotten to “that certain place” it doesn’t satisfy like I think it will. Now you may already be thinking, “Lauren, you’re supposed to be content in the Lord.” And you would be right! But again, I have to ask myself, what does that mean? What does that look like for me to be content in the Lord?
This has been a long process for me, not because the Lord hasn’t been wonderful. He’s shown me boundless love when He speaks, disciplines, comforts, provides, and leads. When I’ve allowed myself to face the truth, the root of the problem is me, namely, my pride. I’ve let this sin reside in me for a long time, but it’s been conniving, masquerading itself as high achievement and determination to excel. To want to excel is not wrong in and of itself, but when it’s never enough, there’s something out of place. This may sound juvenile, but I loved being a student because I was graded. I could see a physical sign of the outcome of my efforts. Those achievements gave me a tangible sense of worth, whether I consciously realized it or not. I just had to know that I was doing everything right because failure wasn’t an option. While striving for excellence can be admirable, it made me afraid to fail at anything. It made me not want to try things that I wasn’t good at. School is where I felt safe so I got a Bachelor’s degree and a Master’s degree all while seeking approval from others in various ways.
But next came being in the real world, and instead of striving for excellence out of my comfort zone, I settled for jobs where I knew I couldn’t really fail. The Lord was gracious to promote me at times, but it wasn’t until I finally pursued teaching (the first time) that I was tested. However, instead of relying on the Lord for guidance and understanding, all I could see was failure after failure. Eventually, I let my anxiety break me to a point I never thought possible, especially as a Christian. That anxiety and depression turned to shame and guilt, which only made it worse.
My pride was saying that I shouldn’t have failed, that it wasn’t an option. But that was a lie. Failure is a part of life that pushes us forward to success if we allow it to. I just couldn’t see that yet. Thankfully, the Lord God blessed me with a family who encouraged me but also didn’t sugarcoat the fact that my pride was truly my downfall. By the grace of God, I slowly climbed out of the pit as I held on to His extended hand. The Lord opened another door for teaching shortly thereafter, and although I was apprehensive, I followed where He led, and He blessed me. There were certainly challenges along the way, but I was able to apply what I learned before and try new things.
However, the Lord has a way of not letting me get too comfortable. I could probably stay in the same routine for the rest of my life if the Lord let me, but another opportunity came up to have a family business. It started growing while I was still teaching, and it got to the point where I had to choose. After much prayer, I chose to quit teaching and focus on the business where I could also be home with my son. The Lord opened the floodgates, and we were getting so many orders that it was hard to keep up. It became a full time job, and old pride was right at my doorstep. “Keep going, you’re helping your family by spending all your time here.” “This is your worth. Look how much you’re making.” So I kept pushing and soon it became my main focus. Work longer. Please your customers. Make money. This is your value to your family. Such thoughts and actions led to strife, and once again, discontentment. It was the same story with different clothes on: pride masquerading as high achievement with the drive to excel at all costs. It wasn’t until I finally stopped and spent time with the Lord about it that He showed me my pride was getting in the way, and I was not acting Christ-like. I also had a lot more to learn about business because even though it looked like I was making X amount of money, I really wasn’t making much at all. But instead of telling me to give it up, the Lord directed me to stop using that outlet for business and use a different one, making smarter and better business decisions along the way. The idea of practically starting over was daunting, but it was a clear message.
I worked and worked to get everything ready, but I was pursuing it at my pace to meet my schedule. Looking back I can’t help thinking, do I ever learn? When I thought I was done, I found out that I had to go over everything again in more detail…and I had to rely on someone else for help. I’ve never liked doing that because I want to do things my way and my pace. As you can see, pride was still hanging around. Another month and a half goes by, and I’m finally ready to reopen, but not much has happened. With all my efforts and hours of connecting with customers and trying social media outlets, I’ve only had a raindrop of orders. Then I hear myself asking God, “Didn’t you tell me to do this, to make a change? Wasn’t this supposed to be successful? I’ve worked so hard, why isn’t this working?” When I finally stopped to listen, He spoke a very clear message: “You have made this your source of contentment.” And then I understood.
Like past times in my life, I get going on what God leads me to do, but then I turn the task into my measure of contentment. I allow what’s good to be overtaken by pride. Pride leads me away from the Lord and turns into strife, frustration, anger and discontentment. Now that I know what the problem is, the Lord has told me to write all of these things so that I can now strive to understand contentment, not only to be accountable for my actions but to also have His truth in the forefront of my mind.
So what is God’s truth regarding contentment? Two passages have been circulating in my mind. The first place to start is in Philippians. Paul and Timothy are writing to the church in Philippi while Paul is imprisoned for the cause of Christ. They encourage the church to remain faithful and bold for the cause of Christ even in the midst of suffering as Paul has experienced and to be united in love and humility rather than become selfish and vain. Paul describes Christ as the ultimate example, writing, “Although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross” (2:6-8). As Christ is our example, contentment begins with selflessness and humility. He could’ve lorded His power over everyone and everything but chose contentment in the imperfect form of humanity to fulfill His purpose, spurned by love for us. In chapter 3 of the letter, Paul also encourages the Philippians to not listen to those who say they need to be circumcised in the flesh but reminds them that their righteousness comes from God through faith. They should remain steadfast and press on. In the final chapter, the church is encouraged to “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (4:6-7).
Contentment has no room for anxiety because it is built on faith, believing that God will take care of things we need. It may not always be the time we expect or in the form we want, but He will hear and answer. In verse 10, Paul expresses his joy that the Philippians were able to provide for his needs, but then he continues saying, “Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me” (4:11-13). Contentment can be found in the poorest and richest of circumstances when the Lord is at the center of it. Contentment can’t be based on financial circumstances because those can change at any moment for any reason. In both situations, we must have faith in the Lord. In poor circumstances, we must have faith that the Lord will provide for what we need. In rich circumstances, we must have faith to be generous to further God’s kingdom and to use it for His purpose. This brings us to the next passage.
In Matthew 6 Jesus is speaking to His disciples about how to be different from the world, namely to focus on the eternal rather than temporary physical and emotional gains. He gives instructions about fasting in secret so that only the Father sees rather than man and about storing up treasures in heaven rather than on earth (vv. 16-21). He addresses the contrast of light and darkness, and more explicitly states in v. 24, “No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth.” In researching the word used for “wealth” (Greek: mamona), it has a negative connotation of worldly wealth. The idea of being a servant is complete devotion to something. As servants of the Lord, we can’t truly be devoted to God and to something else. Does God bless people with wealth? Yes! We can read about a number of people throughout Scripture who have used their wealth to honor the Lord. But in this passage, it’s a matter of where our devotion and faith lie. Are they with the Lord or with the world? Jesus expounds on His statement in v. 25, “For this reason (referencing back to v. 24) I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?” In verses 26-30 He continues to talk about how the Lord provides for nature in many different ways so how much more will He provide for us who are made in His image! Therefore, ““Do not worry then, saying ‘What will we eat?’ Or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear for clothing?’ For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will take care of itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own”” (vv. 31-34).
Looking at this passage in terms of contentment, it boils back down to faith. Do we let our emotions, our anxiety, sway with what we see in the world? Or do we remain devoted to the Lord, trusting that He already knows what we need? Are we living in a state of “what will happen tomorrow?” rather than “how can I be content right now?” Another point to think about from this passage is how much value we have to God. Jesus elaborates how the birds of the air are fed, lilies are clothed more beautifully than Solomon, and the grass is clothed even though it will easily and quickly be burned up. We are His children for whom Jesus (at the time He’s speaking in this passage) is getting ready to sacrifice Himself. We already have immense value without having to earn it. In this passage Jesus is not only teaching truth to His disciples, but He’s preparing them for what’s to come. Some of them left their livelihoods and families to follow Christ. Later on in His ministry, Jesus tells His close disciples to take nothing with them on their travels and other times to bring what He tells them to. In every circumstance, they are being asked to have faith that God will provide the right people in the right places to give what they need. Is this not an example for us? The only way to be content in all circumstances is to seek the Lord and His kingdom first, have faith that He already knows what we need, and trust that whatever the outcome may be, the Lord’s will is best. Faith, of course, is always tested. Will we fail sometimes? Yes. I know I have many times. Jesus’ closest disciples did too. But that wasn’t the end of their ministry, and it won’t be the end of ours either. Rather, may those failures refine us to become better servants of Christ devoted wholly to Him.
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Below is a quick contentment check I created while writing this post to help me when pride wants to come knocking. I plan to print it out to help keep me straight. Feel free to click on this link to use it for yourself or create your own and even add to it.
My Contentment Check
Am I:
- Acting out of selflessness? What can I do for others in the Body of Christ? (Philippians 2)
- Basing decisions in faith (not anxiety) while maintaining devotion to the Lord? (Philippians 4; Matthew 6)
- Basing my contentment on financial circumstances? Remember, contentment can be found in poor and rich circumstances alike with the Lord at the center (Philippians 4; Matthew 6)
- Focused on the present rather than the past or future? (Matthew 6:34)
- Embracing that the Lord values me without having to earn it (Matthew 6:30)
©Lauren Demuth
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